Appy polly loggies, my little droogies, for leaving this for so very long—this chapter is so unbelievably boring and pointless that I couldn’t think of much to say. Even after several more read-throughs I have gleaned very little. I apologise, this will be sparse, but I hate leaving things unfinished, so I’ll do what I can and then I’m going to post this. I’m afraid her Author’s Note is the most interesting part of this entire chapter—see if you can spot yours truly. SNONWARDS (SNAIL ONWARDS)! First chapter here, previous chapter here.
HERE IT IS! The update you’ve all been waiting for! I’m so sorry that it’s taken so long but I’m really trying to get back into the swing of writing. I promise I’m going to write more frequently! Thank you for staying with me!
And you had barely picked the ball back up before you promptly dropped it again.
*Important Note*: I would like to thank one of my reviewers for pointing out that Malorn appears to be very much OOC. However, I wish to clarify that the character I portray him as is solely based on what students outside of the Death school see him as. He only has a mere three lines if you are not in the Death school and do not have the opportunity to speak with him more for other quests.
And still, we talked about this. I told you, even in those ‘mere three lines’ of dialogue, it is made very clear that Malorn has a friendly, welcoming nature—to interpret what he said, how he said it, as standoffish or confrontational, must take someone extremely dull—oh. Wait.
So I do apologize to those of you that are from the Death school, but this is my own, personal spin on the character to make a good story. Thank you for understanding!
Also note: Adding the song “Perfect Life” by Red to the theme of this story. Check it out!
Chapter Eleven: The Burden
*Two weeks later…*
“Ugh…” I slowly blinked my eyes open, groaning in pain. My entire being was sore, and didn’t want to move.
I slowly lifted myself up and I sat on the edge of the bed. On my right was Kalohae curled into a ball with deep burns all over him. Chester was to my left, his breathing shallow. The room around me was entirely made of wood with a few lanterns around the room. Through the paper door, I could make out the figure of someone making dinner. The light of the sun showed through the window with an orange glow touching my face.
??? This story has the most inexplicable prose I’ve ever read. I’m not even kidding—what have you been reading? Where do you go to school??? No, I’m serious—how did you learn to write in this fashion?
When I looked down, I saw the bandages wrapped across my shoulder, down my torso. Half of my body was covered in black bruises, and I was stripped down to my underwear. I clenched my eyes shut and ran my hand through my overgrown hair, and shook it as if shaking the image of the explosion out of my head. I slid off the bed, gripping it for support and grabbed my staff to hold onto to.
When you see it….
I walked slowly to the door, using the staff as a cane.
I slid the paper door to the side, and a goat-woman was cooking some sort of soup in a large pot on the stove. She looked over at me and smiled gently before gazing out to the porch.
You’ve already done this bit Nicole. Last chapter, near the end, he woke up in this hut and met their host and comforted
Nicole you. I’m not even gonna ask why you seem to have wound back a few minutes–I know you’re a shit writer who seems incapable of consistency and who wouldn’t reread her own writing to save her life. WHAT IS THIS INSANE ADVERSITY YOU SEEM TO HAVE TO READING BACK EVEN TWO FUCKING WORDS TO MAKE SURE YOUR WRITING DOESN’T LOOK LIKE A FIFTH-GRADER DID IT??? YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO GO BACK AND READ YOUR OWN STUFF! IT IS THE ONLY WAY TO WEED OUT TYPOS AND PLOT ERRORS SO THAT YOU DON’T LOOK LIKE A COMPLETE, EDITORIALLY INEPT MORON. OH. WAIT.
I leaned the staff against the table and limped over to the porch. I said nothing and just sat down beside her on the steps, gazing up at the stars. She had a large gash on forehead through her right eyebrow. Her face was pale and tear-stained. Suddenly, she looked at me, eyes watering. I ran my hand through her hair and along her cheek. I gently pulled her chin to me and kissed her with the energy I had left in me as the tears rolled down her cheeks onto mine.
You know, I used to write sentences like that. In my self-indulgent tragic Suefic phase…oh. Wait.
*One week later…*
Really? Really? We needed THAT information before we advanced a week to the rest of the story??? Why??? Why did you need to put these two instances a week apart? Why did you need to include this at all, to be frank? It’s unnecessary, it’s clumsy, it’s—bad writing.
We had been taking it easy lately, not going out of the house unless it was to one of the stores across the street. We stayed in to help Mrs. Lin Zeng with taking care of the house and tending to the dragons. Nicole took care of most of the healing and I cleaned the house, took out garbage, and various other stupid shit.
Be careful not to cut yourself on that edge, there.
I found it all pointless because none of these things were preparing us for war. No one knew what was going on with Wizard City. We knew Ravenwood had been attacked from Ambrose trying to contact us. What we didn’t know was the end result.
Thankfully, all of Malistare’s minions had been kicked out before we came to the village in MooShu by Nicole’s team of wizards she used to travel with. At this point, they would have been to Dragonspyre by now, but all the wizards were called back to Wizard City to help Ravenwood.
As for Nicole and I, her levels shot through the roof after surviving the last attack as well as her constant practicing healing. She was already a Master wizard, and I became a Grandmaster.
YOU WERE ALREADY A GRANDMASTER IN THE FIRST CHAPTER! YOU BITCHED ABOUT IT TO FALMEA, I—WOULD IT KILL YOU TO GO BACK AND READ YOUR OWN WRITING NOW AND AGAIN, NICOLE?!
CONTINUITY! WHAT IS IT!!!
That morning, Nicole and I decided it was time to see the village. We were walking hand in hand when Nicole stopped and turned to me.
“Malorn,” she breathed. She kissed me full on the lips and then rested her head on my shoulder in a tight hug. I wrapped my arms around her small, now-athletic frame.
“What’s the matter?” I pulled back and looked into her eyes.
“I’m so afraid of losing you.” She looked down. “Back in that attack, when you got hurt…and then you didn’t wake up, and-“
I cut her off, pressing my finger to her lips. “Shhh… It’s alright now.”
“No it’s not!” she yelled suddenly, and I did a double take. “You could have been killed! What if you were really hurt?! What if Malistare came back?!”
I sighed. “Nicole…. I know. We both know what could happen. But do we really have a say in whether or not we’re part of this mess?” She shook her head.
If I’ve learned anything from J. K. Rowling, you…kinda…do….
“No…. I know that. But I just want you to know how much I love you.”
“I love you too.”
Nicole gasped. “Malorn!” Before I could blink, Nicole tackled me at the waist into the pavement. My eyes snapped shut and a wave of frigid energy shot over us. I opened my eyes.
There were ten wraiths floating above us, closing in. The one had summoned a Vampire and the energy was the wraith trying to suck the life out of me. Nicole jumped up and used her wand to summon a Meteor Strike, hitting four of them, sending them flying backwards. They quickly recouped and started to close in. Nicole looked at me, eyes wide. “RUN!”
“I’m not leaving you!” I held up my staff and shot beams of black energy out. They just passed through them without a second thought. I did a double-take.
“They don’t want me!” she yelled, summoning a Fire Dragon. “They want you!”
And you acquired this specific information when? Or do you now suddenly have some Sue-ish clairvoyance that allows you to know when and if certain enemies are after you or if they’re after Malorn?
I summoned a Banshee and pointed it toward two of the wraiths in front of me. She started to scream as the wraiths fell back. “MALORN!”
The next few seconds were the longest of my life.
My head turned just as a wraith glided straight for me. I held my staff up and beams of black energy shot out when the wraith fell on top of me.
My staff exploded and the world went dark.
*In an undetermined world, a few hours later…*
I snapped my eyes shut as a piercing slap slashed across my right cheek. I kept my eyes glued to the floor.
“Time to wake up!“
Uh, if his eyes were open, then wouldn’t he already be awake?
I looked up, shaking from the shock.
I was staring straight into my father’s glare.
“How are you, my son?”
Jfc what’s with him emphasising the last word in his sentences
I glared back, not even blinking. My arms were tied up to the ceiling by cables. The room was dark and cold, with only one light shining directly on me, the white walls on all sides seemed to close in.
*sigh* You can’t just switch tenses like that. You should have learned this by now, in school.
He tilted his head to the left slightly and narrowed his eyebrows.
“You know, this troubles me.” He moved his staff and turned his back from me. “Now, don’t try anything silly, my boy. You see, you are powerless here.” I harnessed as much energy as I could without my staff, but before I could even think about unleashing it, a current of energy shot down the cables and electrified my entire body. My arms and legs jerked around violently as the pressure in my face nearly reached a breaking point; just before it did, the shocks ceased and my body went limp. “If you couldn’t already tell, those are magical energy cables, and they will continue to shock you if you even think about using your magic against me. So I’ll have you know that I intend to break you, Malorn.” He walked to the door on the opposite side of the room. He turned back to me, and I glared into his eyes, struggling to control my breath.
He shut the door behind him.
I stared at the floor, my breaths were shallow. I knew what was going to happen if I didn’t hold onto myself. If I lost touch with who I am, I would have become the monster we all knew I was destined to be. But I wasn’t about to think about that. I needed to focus on the one thing that kept me safe from the horrors of the Spiral and insanity.
Date of death: 16 December, 2015
Cause of death: Crappily executed clichéd trope overdose.
*One week later…*
The door screeched open, and I knew what was coming.
“Hello Malorn! Good to see you again!” The whole week, he hadn’t come in the room. In fact, no one came in the room. No food. Only a few drops of water that drop out of the ceiling kept me alive.
Bitch do you even know how the human body fucking works??? Everyone over the age of 12 knows the basic time limit for survival without food is one week with water, and three days without. A few drops of water wouldn’t keep him alive, and any prison keeper with half a brain knows to supply their prisoner with at least enough food and water to keep them alive and draw out the torture. You literally said this is what Malistaire aimed to do.
I made no move to look at him. His cheery, condescending attitude pissed me the fuck off.
“Something wrong, my boy? Why won’t you look at your father?” He was toying with me, and I was growing angrier by the second. But I knew if I just rolled with the punches, he’d be kinder to me. “Is everything alright with school?” He paused as my nostrils flared. “Oh dear, you look rather weak…. Have you been eating right?” He waited before snapping his fingers.
The scent made my senses go wild.
I finally looked up without a second thought and saw a plate with meat. I didn’t care what it was. All I could think was, “Food.“
“Oh! You want this?” he asked. I just kept staring at the plate. A fork appeared in his hand and He stabbed the slab of meat. “It just looks so very…delectable.” He raised it to his nose and took the deepest breath I’d ever seen and sighed heavily. He walked toward me and went to wave it under my nose, but I just snapped my head forward and tore a piece off with my teeth.
So you’re a snake now???
Humans are incapable of doing that kind of thing. When have you ever SEEN an actual human do that???
The speed made him drop the meat to the floor. “Tsk tsk, Malorn.” He reached down and stabbed it again with unnecessary force. Your food is going to go to waste now….” He clicked his fingers and the meat disappeared with the fork.
“What do you fucking want?” I snapped. I couldn’t take it anymore.
“Now, now, is that any way to address your father?” Immediately at the last word, the cables holding me upright attacked my body in a rage of magically energy. I yelled in obvious agony, my body contorting, insanely.
Nope. Too easy.
When the energy stopped flowing, I panted. “What…do you…want?”
“No shit.” He simply raised his staff and shot me in the chest with a beam of energy.
“Still defiant, are we?”
“Just fucking tell me and I won’t keep ignoring you.”
When are you going to learn that swearing is not a writing device? Do you think it makes you look more mature, is that your problem? Or do you think it makes Malorn look stronger or edgier or more badass or some shit??? To both questions, the answer is no, it doesn’t.
“Fine then….” He walked away from me, pacing around the room. “Sigh….” Yes, he literally said it. I was seconds from screaming again. “You take all the fun out of everything. You see, I need your help.”
“Why would you need me?”
“There is someone in particular…that is getting in my way.”
“Your little pet.”
“Nicole?!” I thought about Nicole, and her light, her beauty…utterly astonished.
*bangs head against desk until concussed*
“But why would-?” Then it hit me. “Her dad.”
“Ah! Now we have something to go on, don’t we?”
“The one that originally banished you from the Spiral…that was Nicole’s dad. I was right….” That also explained why her dad died in the process.
“You’re getting warmer, my boy. Why would I need you?”
“If her dad died but managed to defeat you…having me on your side….”
“Would guarantee your victory.”
WHY DIDN’T YOU FIGURE THAT OUT EARLIER??? WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD HE WANT YOU BUT TO SUCCEED IN CONQUERING THE SPIRAL???
“And there we are! You’ve figured it out!”
I started chuckling, then laughing, then full on hysterics. Malistare used the magical energy on me again and I stopped immediately.
“Why would you laugh at me?”
“Like I’d ever join you.”
“Oh, but you will!”
“Give me one good reason why I would?”
“You’re here.” He pointed at my cables. “Nicole is somewhere out there. How do you expect to save her when I just…?” He made his hand into a fist and magical energy glowed around his hand. “I could kill her in a heartbeat,” he said, his voice now harsh, dropping the fatherly approach. “Give me your choice.”
If she’s the only thing standing in your way and you have the ability to kill her easily, why have you not done so???
“You’d kill Nicole either way. The choice wouldn’t change anything.”
He smirked. “Oh, don’t be so sure. If you don’t join me willingly, I could just make you.“
If you have the ability to force Malorn to join you easily, WHY HAVE YOU NOT DONE SO???
“You can’t control me.”
Are you sure Malorn? Do you really love her? It was his voice in my head. I tried to shake it, but it was like trying to block out a fog horn. She’s so frail. You could easily prove your worth and crush her! Her small little neck can be cracked if you just-
“GET OUT OF MY HEAD!” I shouted at him. The voices ceased at once.
“You see what I can do to you now?” Malistare walked slowly to the door. “In due time, my son.”
*Two days later….*
The door was opening again. It didn’t even faze me. The footsteps were smaller and quickly paced. Once they were close enough, I heard a panicked voice.
OH GOLLY GOSH GEE I WONDER WHO IT COULD FUCKING BE
“Malorn? Malorn?! Malorn, we need to get you out of here!” A heard a faint flapping of wings to right of the girl, whoever she was.
it is a mystery
I still didn’t look up. “Malorn, are you alright? God, what did he do to you?” I felt a hand under my chin left up my head. “Open your eyes!”
My eyes opened.
I literally just snorted oh my God that was such a hilarious and spectacularly poor choice of words
Her hair was pulled into a long braid behind her, and she was dressed in the black of the ninjas of MooShu. But as always, her blue eyes seemed to glisten with comfort of love and purity.
‘Comfort of love and purity’??? ‘Purity’???
“Nicole….” I rasped her name. “Get away from me. Get…out while you can.”
“No! I’m not leaving you!” She started to undo the cables, melting the cuffs with her fire magic. “This is gonna burn a little.”
“You don’t… you don’t understand….” How could I tell her that I could become Malistare’s pawn at any moment?
Well, for starters, I would try saying ‘I could become Malistaire’s pawn at any moment’. You’re always banging on about how strong she is—what, do you think she can’t handle it??? Pick an opinion, author.
“There’s no time!” The first cuff melted away.
“Malistare…. He can….”
“It’s okay, I’ll get you out of here.”
“He can control me, Nicole!” I shouted with all of the energy left in me. She stopped melting the cuff and looked into my eyes. She searched them for something…anything but what she just heard.
“It won’t happen. I love you.”
And what in the seven bleeding Hells does that have to do with anything? What could possibly make you believe that your oh-so-important love for Malorn is all that’s needed to stop Malistaire from utilising this nonsense power he apparently has over Malorn? Bitch get the fuck over yourself!
“My fiery light…” I said, putting it as gently as possible,
*projectile vomits into bucket*
“I love you more than anything. But if you let me go, I could kill you.”
“I’m going to save you. I’ll do anything.” There was no use. I’d have to let her take me. The second cuff melted off. I fell to the ground and groaned. I got on my hands and knees with Nicole helping me up. “I know it hurts. Come on, there’s not much time.” She stood me up with my arm draped over her shoulder. Sir Chester flew under my other arm, holding me around his slim neck.
“YOU!” Malistare roared with a slam of the door hitting the wall. His eyes turned completely black, not even the outer rim of his eyes showing white. He started to charge at us, but Nicole shot out fire blasts faster than he could run. He dodged some and got singed by others. Nicole clasped her eyes shut, and just as his hand reached out to grab me, we teleported away in a mist of flame.
*In MooShu, seconds later…*
We appeared in the main courtyard of the palace.
“Ugh….” Nicole groaned and collapsed to the floor. I rolled away from her without any energy left.
“Nicole….” I reached out for her.
All of a sudden, a magical mist formed around her, and fiery red-orange wings erupted from her back. My eyes widened as she slowly got on her hands and knees, then glided toward me with her wings. She picked me up in her arms and with Sir Chester fluttering behind, and flew quickly back to the hut.
WHY THE FUCK WERE THE WINGS NECESSARY?!! I—JESUS I CAN’T EVEN PUT WORDS TOGETHER TO DESCRIBE HOW UNNECESSARY AND HORRIBLE THIS IS I’M SO MAD
“How did you…?”
“I got a few tips from Ambrose….” She trailed off, focusing on the hut ahead of us. “He told me that my dad used wings too. He genetically enhanced his own wings and coded it into his own DNA using magic, and passed it onto me. Technically, any wizard can have them, but it’s less common with all the newly discovered magical creatures people use to get around. I find these easier though…and less hazardous to the magical creatures.”
“He’s alive?” All I could process was that she spoke to Ambrose. I cared about her dad, but I was in too much of a fog to think about that. I thought that after that one time Ambrose spoke to us, he was gone.
“Yeah…. I’ll tell you more another time.” She looked down at me and smiled weakly. The tears in her eyes made me realize what my absence had done to her.
The smiled sparked something in me. It was there before, but faint. Now it was a warm glow.
“I’ll never leave you, Nicole. I will never hurt you. I love you.”
*head falls onto desk in exhaustion and nausea*
*muffled voice* I’m done. Goodbye.
We arrived at the hut and she flew me into the bedroom, resting me on the cot.
“Rest now.” She stroked my hair. “I love you too.”
Thank you all for staying with my story! I love you all! Posting will definitely be more frequent now
It’s been a literal year and more since you posted this, I guess we see how that turned out.
Jesus Christ I’m finally done—if she ever does post another chapter, which I severely doubt, since she’s been inactive for quite a while, I hope there’ll be more to work with. Why I spent two and a half years picking over this wretched thing…ah well, at least it was fun! ‘Til next time, O my brothers.